Winter Living

This week it is very cold in WI. Today when I woke up, I checked to see if Nate had school because they were predicting wicked windchills. Luckily, it was only -16F, so school was NOT canceled today. I do hope that they had indoor recess, though. Because it's been so cold, Abbie and I have been spending a lot of time at home. We have been doing a sort of mid-winter clean because I think that if we wait for spring cleaning, I'd end up spending until next winter to get it habitable again. It feels nice to have a warm, clean home to spend our days in. I'm very grateful for a cozy home.

This morning, I woke up on the complete wrong side of bed. I was in a very sour mood. Alan was on his way out the door as we got up, but I asked him if he could just stay for 2 more minutes (so that I could pee in peace). Long story short, Alan ended up staying home until 8:15(!!) to take Nate to school. It was unbelievable. We all ate breakfast together. Alan shoveled. I'm literally speechless when I try to describe how wonderful it was to have him home in the morning. I honestly can't remember the last time that he was home when we got up, let alone for getting ready. It was like a crazy late Christmas present! I felt giddy with joy and my day got off to a MUCH better start. I really love Alan and I am so grateful that he was able and willing to spend some extra time to help me out this morning. It was a real blessing.

This is Abbie's favorite place to be. She'll spend a half an hour sitting here. She reads or talks to herself. You'll notice the heating vent right below her feet.

Nate recreating A Christmas Story.

This is how I found the dustpan after Abbie swept the bathroom. I thought it was just too cute that she hung the big dustpan on her mini-broom, like I do on my big broom.

Abbie helped me declutter and arrange all of the pictures, etc. on our fridge.

Abbie and Nate have some new jobs that they have to do twice a week around the house. Abbie's job is to clear the bathroom counter, wipe it down and then put everything back. She takes it very seriously. Nate's job is to wipe around the bottom of the toilet--He hates it. (I told him that I hate it too and if he'd just watch where he pees, he would only have to do it once a week.)

Overall, things are going very well for us. I feel very blessed. This is the first time in, well I really don't even know how long, that I am not depressed. It's amazing. I have been hesitating saying anything because I didn't want to jinx myself, but you know what?, I have worked incredibly hard to get to this place and I am going to share it. I credit (in no particular order) medication, exercise, diet, my light box, and a whole lot of self-critiquing, self-realization, perspective and serious work. I also credit the support of my friends and family. And God. I would be ungrateful if I didn't say that God had a part in this. I think that the key for me that makes this time different than others, is that I've worked really hard to get out of this last depression. I mean I have worked REALLY HARD. It wasn't just medication and I didn't just slip into a better place in my life. This was due to some serious time and energy. That's what makes me confident that I'll be okay for a while. I know that it will probably come back at some point in my life because like Diabetes, it's just one of those diseases that people like me have to deal with for all of our living days, but I feel confident that I can beat it again when it rears its ugly head. For now, I am better. I am healthy and happy, despite everything in my life that tries to bog me down. Hallelujah.

Friends are Important

I've been thinking lately about how important friends are. I will be the first one to say that Alan is my best friend. He has been for years and years. I guess that I'm talking about friends other than a spouse/boyfriend/etc. Girlfriends, college friends, old friends. These people are SO important in my life. I think that in the beginning of a relationship, two people get so wrapped up in each other that they sometimes forget the other people in their lives. That's natural. But I can also remember reminding myself in Alan's and my early years that I needed to keep my friends close. There are things that husbands just can't understand. Alan is empathetic and thoughtful and an amazing listener, but he doesn't spend 24 hours a day, 7 days a week caring for children the way that some of my friends do. He doesn't know what it's like to wait at home every night, knowing that he's going to be late again, the way that my friend, Rachel, who's husband is also a Resident, does. I can remember somebody telling me when Alan and I got married, "Don't ditch your friends. A guy should never come between girlfriends." I might have been slightly offended at the time, but I value that advice now. I need my friends in my life. I need them every single day. Just yesterday I spent hours with a good friend, talking about something in a way that Alan and I just couldn't have done. It's not a problem with our relationship; there are just some things that are better discussed with other friends. Alan was at work yesterday. He couldn't call me back because he was in rounds. I needed a friend and he just physically could not be here. Thank goodness I had somebody else to go to. It's plain and simple. There are times in our lives when our spouses cannot be around. They have to work, they are busy with a calling, etc, etc. There are times in our lives when we WILL NEED our friends. I want to do everything that I can to make sure that I have my friends around when I need them, and everything I can to make sure that I am around when my friends need me. It goes both ways. I encourage you to do the same.

My Nate-Nate

I have been debating about whether or not to post this for days and days now. I spent several hours talking with a true friend this afternoon and now feel like I have to post this. About a month and a half ago, we noticed that the left side of Nate's mouth was not working quite right. It just didn't move the way that the right side of his mouth did. He saw his regular pediatrician who couldn't find anything wrong with him at all. She did say, though, that she'd call and run it past a pediatric neurologist for us. She called back and said that they thought it was probably just a very mild Bell's Palsy. They did a CBC and it was totally normal. We were supposed to call back if it didn't go away in a few weeks. For a while, it seemed like it was getting better. It wasn't nearly as pronounced as when we first noticed it. So we spoke with his pediatrician and decided it was nothing. Well, it's still not gone. I called his regular doc back and they referred us to one of the pediatric neurologists. I called and spoke to this doc's nurse who told me that they were extremely busy and she wasn't sure that they'd be able to fit me in at all--Like it would be months. She said that she'd speak to the doc and get back to me. Well, she called back an hour later and said that they want to see Nate this coming Thursday. The doctor is concerned because of Alan's (Nate's) family history. Alan had Leukemia in high school, his younger brother had a brain tumor in high school, and his oldest brother had Testicular cancer a few years ago. So now I'm doing everything I can NOT to think about why they scheduled him so soon. I'm so scared. I can't write anymore because I can't let myself think about the possibilities. I am not going to go down that road. I am going to stay positive because there's nothing to worry about until there's something to worry about. I really didn't want to post this on my blog because I don't want people worrying about this unnecessarily. I don't want to make a big deal about this. But I do want to ask for your prayers. Don't do it for me, but please do it for Nate. I'm just asking that he be included in your prayers for the next week. I really need him to be okay. I need for Heavenly Father to know how many people love Nate and want him to be healthy. Okay, even saying that much is going too far. I have to stop. But please, if you pray, and even if you don't or haven't in a while, please pray to whoever or whatever you pray to, that Nate is okay. Thank you so much. Emily

Jacob Black

January 7, 2009

Good news about New Moon from director Chris Weitz:

I'm very happy to announce that Taylor Lautner will be playing Jacob Black in New Moon and that he's doing so with the enthusiastic support of Summit Entertainment, the producers, and Stephenie Meyer.

The characters in Stephenie's books go through extraordinary changes of circumstance and also appearance; so it is not surprising that there has been speculation about whether the same actor would portray a character who changes in so many surprising ways throughout the series. But it was my first instinct that Taylor was, is, and should be Jacob, and that the books would be best served by the actor who is emotionally right for the part. I think that fans of Twilight the book and the movie will be surprised by the Jacob Black that Taylor will bring to the screen in New Moon; and I'm looking forward to working with him and the rest of the cast in realizing the film.

very best

Chris Weitz

I'd just like to add that I was very much a part of this decision. My first priority was always what was best for New Moon—what was going to give us the best possible movie. I'm truly thrilled that Taylor was the one who proved to the director, to Summit, and to me that he is the best possible Jacob we could have. And I'm very much looking forward to seeing what he's going to bring to Jacob's character this year.

- Steph [Stephanie Meyer]

Wahoo!!

I do realize that he looks rather ridiculous in this picture. It's the first one that I could find, though, and I should really be making Nate's lunch for school, not scouring the internet for Twilight information.

Worth the Effort

So my exercising... It's not doing what I had hoped it would. I lost 5 lbs initially and now I have been stuck for the last 3 weeks with no weight loss. I am still doing between 30-60 minutes at least 6 days per week. I'm monitoring my calories, etc. I can't quite figure it out. Weight Watchers is having a free 1 wk trial for their online program so I'm going to try that out. It's only a week and if it can get me past this stupid stuck point... Enough griping, though. Despite my lack-luster weight loss, I have reaped an amazing benefit from exercising daily. My migraines are GONE! I was back to suffering from CDH (Chronic Daily Headache) to the point of using an entire package of Imitrex in 1 week. That's 9 tablets. NOT GOOD. My health, my mood and my ability to function was pretty bad. I was meaning to call my doctor to start another prophylactic med when suddenly, my migraines disapeared. They didn't just start to space out or decrease in severity. They are completely gone. I haven't had a migraine in 2 and a half weeks. This is HUGE! I've never found a prophylactic treatment, and I've tried a ton of meds, that worked this well. I'm astonished. I'm amazed. I am SO happy. So even if I'm still fat, at least my head doesn't hurt. At least I have another reason to keep on keeping on.

Clearing My SD Card

Cinderella is a fat cat.

Nate is a stud

My hibiscus bloomed! (So wonderful to see in the dead of winter)

Driving down to Ikea

The kids snacking and watching Mamma Mia on the way to Ikea

Lunch at Ikea (Could they possibly be more alike?) Lunch with Mr. Smiley at Ikea

A sink! (We had a photo scavenger hunt for the kids so that they wouldn't go nuts)

A white table!

A white desk!

If nothing else, he makes us laugh. :)

Abbie is a Sunbeam!!!!!!!!! (She now goes to Sunday School instead of Nursery at church--Sunbeams are the 3 year olds)

I honestly don't think I could love her more--She's just so cute!

2008 In Pictures

I saw this slide show with some of the craziest pictures from 2008. Some of the photos are amazing! Check it out! 2008 In Pictures

Change of Heart

I just finished reading a couple of books, one of which is Change of Heart by Jodi Picoult. I'm not really sure how to describe it--It's pretty complicated. I'm not sure what I thought of it either. I think it's one of those books that you have to discuss to really be able to formulate an opinion. Has anybody else read this book?

I Love Winter (said thick with sarcasm)

Snowfall record for single month tumbles

The Capital Times — 12/29/2008 7:01 pm

With about three months to go in the winter of 2008-09, Madison could end up with the average total amount of snow for a season already before the calendar is flipped to the new year.

With 42.9 inches already in November and December, the 1-3 inches expected on Tuesday could push the snowfall total up to the average 45 inches that normally falls in any given winter in these parts, with the brunt of winter still to come.

The record snowfall in December is now at 38.6 inches, breaking the previous December mark of 35 inches set in 2000 as well as the previous monthly mark of 37 inches that fell in February 1994.

The Madison area did fail to break another record Saturday when temperatures reached a high of 49 degrees early in the morning. That was 1 degree shy of the record for that day of 50, set on Dec. 27, 2003.

Weather Central meteorologist Kelly Curran said the warmth will come back Monday with a high in the upper 30s after a high of 28 on Sunday, one degree above normal.

The warmer temps will be accompanied by strong winds, gusting up to 40 miles per hour Monday afternoon, according to the National Weather Service.

The light snow on Tuesday could get blown around, but the snow isn't expected to cause driving problems.

New Year's Eve on Wednesday will be colder with highs in the low 20s, but travel should be good with sunny skies and no snow.

On New Year's Day, there's another chance of light snow, but little or no accumulation is expected.

A chance of snow is in the forecast for the upcoming weekend, but little or no accumulation should come of it, with highs in the low 20s to start out 2009.

Road conditions around Wisconsin were in relatively good shape Monday morning, with some slippery stretches reported on highways in southern and central Wisconsin.

Seriously?? Last year we had over 100" of snow. How can we be ahead of that?!

Our Christmas-Part 1

Waking Unkey Mikey on Christmas Morning

Abbie's new baby

Nope, not Nate's. That's Alan's new remote control helipcopter

Nate with Darth Mal's ship--He's been asking for this since last Christmas

Encouraging activity--Glow-in-the-dark soccer ball

Santa brought Abbie a princess bike

This is how we seated 15 people for Christmas Dinner Abbie rocking it out on my new karaoke machine (for i pod!) Nate's lego castle--He hasn't stopped playing with it since he built it

I don't know why we wasted so much time and effort on med school when he could have done this for a living

I Can Eat!

So I have spent the past couple of days researching healthy weight loss, exercise, etc. I am definitely not eating enough. With my current weight, activity level, daily exercise, I need to be eating nearly double what I'm eating now. Wahoo! It's backwards in my head to eat more to lose weight, and thus a challenge to convince myself it's okay to eat that extra snack in the afternoon, but since cutting the calories obviously isn't working, I'm going to try this. I found a great site: www.thedailyplate.com This site allows you to track what you eat (they have a HUGE food database), caloric needs, goals, exercise, etc. The best part is that it's all free. I'm going to try this for a while. I'll let you know how it goes.

Just a Note

I was reminded by my SIL, Diana, today that it had been a while since I have updated my blog. Sorry! I have been updating the exercise ticker at the bottom, but it's true that I haven't posted n a while. We've had a busy week. I have lots of pictures from Christmas and the other things that we've been doing, mostly with Alan's family, but I haven't gotten them off the camera yet. We've been spending most of our time with Alan's siblings who are in town--Andrea, Michael, and Diana. Diana is here with her fiance. It doesn't seem like we've really done a whole lot, so I don't have much to say. I'm still exercising like crazy. I got pretty frustrated this week because I actually gained two pounds, putting my net loss at 2 lbs at 2 weeks. Ugh. I'm not sure what my deal is--I can't possibly exercise more than I already am. 60 minutes a day is all my body can handle. I'm trying to drink more water too. I've been keeping track of my calories and the only thing that Alan and I can figure out is that I'm not eating enough, which is sending my body into starvation mode. As difficult as it is, I'm going to try to eat more this week and see what happens. Any tips would be greatly appreciated. It's hard to be motivated to spend so much time kicking my own trash when I'm not even seeing any results. I'll post again when I have a free minute and get our holiday pics onto the computer. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Half Way There

I have done 510 minutes of exercise since I started this kick and I have 510 minutes to go before the end of 2008. Family starts coming today, so we'll see how I do! On a sad note... I ended up throwing away almost all of my not-quite-cooked toffee. I would have been embarrassed to give it away and so I was the only one eating it. Really, binging on it. I was not about spend an hour every day working out until I was almost dead, just to negate it with a bunch of toffee. So yes, I'm still working on self-control. :)

Exercise Update

So far, so good. I've been doing 60 minutes every day on the elliptical. It usually comes out to about 8 miles. I've also upped the level from 1 to 3 which gives me more resistance and makes it more difficult. I'm feeling good. It feels great to know that even after a week, I'm still on track. I lost 4 lbs this week too--It's much easier to stay motivated when I see results. I am still working on my eating habits. I definitely should not have made toffee this week. I just stuck the tupperware out in the snow, instead of keeping it in the freezer. I hate the cold and even toffee won't motivate me to go outside if I don't have to. I'm going to stock up on fruit so that I have something yummy to eat during the day, other than cookies and crackers, etc. I can control my portions much more easily than I can cut out the snacking. I'm thinking that I might need to change my exercise goal of 60 minutes a day. I got a DVD today that lasts about a half an hour and it absolutely kicked my trash. There's no way that I could physically do the DVD and then a half hour on the elliptical too. I hurt too much to sit up straight while playing the piano! I'll see how I feel tomorrow--Maybe I'll alternate the DVD and the hour on the elliptical and weight and situps. I thought that I might be able to just do the DVD 2x in a day, like once in the morning and once in the evening, but I don't think that I'd be able to hold my head up straight. I guess that the important thing is that I'm exercising every day and I know that I am working all of my muscles because I can feel them! It's a long road that I'm on. Weight loss just plain sucks. I am encouraged, though, by my ability to make it past week 1. I also know that it's so important for my kids to learn that exercise is something we do regularly--It's a very crucial part of life. Abbie is doing jumping jacks/dancing while I do the elliptical in the morning and she was doing her best to keep up with the DVD today. Both Abbie and Nate report on whether or not they've done their stretches every day. I never asked them, they just started telling me themselves. I guess they get that it's somewhat important! Here's to keeping goals and losing weight during the holidays!

Winter Wonderland

Holy cow--We got a lot of snow! I think that we got about a foot of snow. I spent about an hour and a half shoveling our driveway, sidewalks and the steps up to our house. There was a three foot pile of snow across the entire bottom of the driveway where the plow went by. That was back-breaking! The kids had a great time playing. Abbie was a bit intimidated at first because the snow was up past her knees, but then she got into it. I think that I shoveled our sidewalks at least 4 times because they would push buckets of snow back onto the sidewalk every time they walked out of the snow. The temperature was a major blessing today. I think that the high was 28--It was so warm compared to the negative temps we've been having. We were able to stay outside for a full hour and a half straight; I even took my coat off after shoveling for a while. I must say that it's not the snow that makes me dread winter. I dread the cold. When it's 28 degrees, I can handle it!

A Little Christmas Miracle

Tonight I asked Abbie to go brush her teeth. She ignored me, like usual. (Sometimes I am genuinely concerned that she has a hearing problem...). I threatened timeout and she started meandering. Then, I told her that if she didn't get a move on, I was going to french braid her hair into four different braids. She RAN to the bathroom. I have never seen that girl move so fast. Now if I can only figure out how to get her to let me do her hair...

Christmas Is Coming!

I've spent the last few days getting ready for Christmas. We finally got our Christmas tree, decorated it and put our lights up outside the house. We got all of our Christmas decorations up as well, which is, well, quite a feat. Christmas is my favorite holiday. It's Alan's favorite holiday too. We LOVE Christmas! We have quite a collection of Christmas "stuff" and we also received a lot of my grandma's Christmas things. Now our house is transformed. We have more Christmas decorations than we know what to do with! I love it. I also love having so many of my grandma's things--I am reminded of her everywhere I look. Today I made Christmas goodies. (I hate that word, but I think it's better than "treats.") I made Peppermint Bark, Toffee and Sugar Cookies. Nate and Abbie helped decorate the sugar cookies this afternoon and had a blast. My toffee didn't turn out as well. It still tastes great, but I realized after the fact that my candy thermometer was not working right--The paper with the temperatures had slid out of place inside the thermometer. Hence, my toffee is definitely not hard crack. It's more like soft. Oh well. Now I have a reason to make more! More baking tomorrow! Here are some pictures:

I love this Nativity plate.

Our ginormous Christmas tree! (We have always been big-tree people, but we were a little shocked at how big this tree was once we got it home)

My grandma's angel Our Christmas Village My Hibiscus tree is about to bloom! Our window seat with our candle advent calendar

This is our Nativity collection. The majority of these were from my grandma. They are from all over the world.

This is what the drying rack (over a cookie sheet) looked like after all of our Christmas cookies were iced and left to dry there. My first attempt at Peppermint Bark. Yum! My not-quite-cooked Toffee Decorated Sugar Cookies!

My Tickers

I've hit my limit. I have reached the point where I am SO done being fat, it's not even funny. Earlier in my life, I was in very good shape. I worked out daily, did aerobics in college (it's great motivation to go if you're getting graded) and ate well. If I started to slack, I'd work hard for a few weeks and lose the five pounds I had gained. If you've seen me in the last 2 years, well, it's obvious that I lost that habit. I am fat. My arms are huge, my thighs make the earth move when I walk, my face is rounder than a full moon and I have so many chins that I lost count 2 months ago. I won't even start talking about how my gut is larger than during my pregnancy with 8.5 lb Abbie. I'm disgusted with myself. Granted, I gained this weight due to medications and illness. I gained 50 lbs in 3 months. Yuck. But that was last year. I still look like this. Yuck again. I am done being fat. I do not want to avoid old friends because I'm embarrassed for them to see me like this anymore. I don't want weight to become an issue for Abbie because I'm constantly obsessing about what I eat, etc. I want to teach my children to be healthy, to exercise and to eat right. That all starts with me. Thus, my tickers. At the bottom of my blog, I have 2 tickers. They mark my progress in this ridiculous/annoying journey and serve as a constant reminder to me of what I need to be working on. Exercise has become my passion. I am doing between 6 and 8 miles per day, sometimes split into a morning and an evening session. I am also doing weights. I know that my metabolism is changing because I am constantly hungry. I am eating healthy foods, though, and working VERY HARD at portion control. Getting healthy has become my life. I have tried to just kind of do it along the way, but obviously it hasn't worked. This is what I have to do. This is what I will do. Yes, that was me giving myself a pep-talk. Go! Go! Go!

Our Trip to Texas

This last week, our family traveled to Houston, TX. It was a treat that we were all able to go--Alan actually had a few days of vacation! We met my twin sister, Rachel, and her baby boy, Ben, there. My little sister, Liz, lives in Houston, as do my parents. We had a good trip. It was great to see family and hang out with my sisters again. I had over 600 pictures total from each person's camera, so I made a little slide show of our trip:

FYI--I didn't intend for the first few pictures to be the ridiculously hilarious ones; it just happened. And Liz, I tried to not have "that picture" as the one that opens it, but I can't make it change. :)

New Blog

My quote section was getting too extensive for the bottom of the blog. I started another blog just for the stupid/hilarious/ridiculous things people say. Check it out! Somebody Actually Said That?

Some of Our Thanksgiving Weekend in Pictures

Snowball fight

Unckey Mikey with all the stuff Nate and Abbie piled on him when they found him asleep on our couch in the morning

My cherry and apple pies

Abbie in leg-warmers